It's not always easy being a PokerStars blogger. Sometimes I feel I lack the skills I need to do the job properly. Like today. Today it is my duty to tell you about a new promotion for French, and French speaking, players. Of course I don't speak French.

Undeterred this intrepid blogger reached for her French Dictionary, and couldn't find it, so loaded up a 'Babel Fish' online language translator web page.

If you 'parlez Français' you will find it useful to visiting this page which lists full details of these special freeroll tournaments.

I persevered with a web-translator-translated page of text in my attempts to research this event. I discovered the freerolls send players to a televised final on the 'Direct 8' TV channel. I marvelled at the baffling translated text that appeared. At 14h10 it was possible to watch 'THE WAR OF THE PRIVATE ONES: BYE CHICKENS'.

How could I fail to be intrigued by the show, 'SPLASH DANCE?' In the name of research I had to learn more. 'Who will dare to wet his shirt not to finish soaked? Placed on two headlands with the top of the swimming pool, candidates are in the center of the attentions. They have three minutes to convince. After deliberation of the jury, the headland of the losers is concealed under their feet and "splash"!'

Sounds exciting! But I hadn't forgotten it was my mission to bring you informative poker news, so I learned, 'Direct Poker is the first emission which gives to its televiewers the advisability of playing the poker in one hour a weekly emission when qualified the online clashes with television until the great final which will designate the winner.'

Don't worry, I didn't need to rely on online translations. I asked someone in the office about the French poker freerolls. Apparently the tournaments run on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, and are open to all players from Belgium, Luxembourg, France, and Monaco. Four satellites will award seats daily, sending 48 players to another tournament. Each final will send 24 players to the television show taping in Paris on 30 August.

So there you have it. Facts. Job done.

'All summer, Direct 8 organizes you voyages out of the commun run. Leave at the end of the world to discovered exotic nature and cultures... immediate loading for idyllic destinations with accompanying adventurous to figure the... daring one.'

13h40 BIKINI DESTINATIONS. If you watch this and fold your straight by mistake, don't blame me.

Bonne chance! Or as a Babel Fish translator might put it, 'Well luckiest!'